Ripped abs, tight glutes, and shimmering bronzed skin define the Summer months. People watching on white sand beaches conjures up even the most confident ego’s body issues. “Damn that guy’s huge” and “that skinny girl has cellulite?” dance through your thoughts. As much as we self analyze and question how taut our own inner thighs are as we run down the beach, Summer allows you to view real bodies.
Baring all allows you to see the cellulite, the imperfect abs and the pastiness that comes from a few too many hours in the office. Outside the magazines and the plasticized celebs on the big screen, real life, bodies and people exist.
As I lay sun baking in Cairns, Australia, surrounded by deeply bronzed young tourists I can’t help but watch with relief. A few weeks ago when I submerged from a terrential 10 month Winter, stripping down to a bikini, as you can imagine, was bizarre. Even though I was confident about my shape, exposing gleaming white skin to the world was unnerving as hell. Note to self: Use a self tanner to transfer seasons in such extreme circumstances. Nonetheless I was relieved to see real women strutting their stuff. Curvy, sexy bodies that could actually fill their string bikinis.
Many of us spend endless hours at the gym during Spring shaping up for the exposure of Summer. And while it’s important to keep moving, have fitness goals and aim for perfection, know deep down that perfection can’t be obtained. And that the search for perfection in itself is maddening.
Perfectionism can grip your life, wring it of it’s juices and leave you dry and lonely as you obsess over the labels of two different cereal boxes. As Nikki says, “Cereal shopping was a lot more fun when I was concerned more about the toy then the fiber.” The intense analysis of everything on our fork and leanness of our midsections is exhausting, extreme, and breeds unnecessary stress. Something we are trying to limit in epic health and longevity!
As Micheal Jackson once said, “we are our own worst critic.” And we know how he ended up! But in all seriousness, (I love MJ!) perfectionism is so overrated.
So as the sunny days dwindle and the romps in the waves succeed we can relax in knowing that we are good enough. That we aren’t alone in the world of real bodies.
This post was brought to you by Only In A Woman’s World.
{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }
Good points to remember!
I’ve never been the bearer of a really great tan (damn English/Norse heritage), but I know that keeping realistic about that (and my workout goals) will allow me to be happy nonetheless!
I’m a guy but still found this post very relevant. I like how you said that perfection is unachievable. In the past when learning Chinese, I would drive myself mad trying to have perfect pronunciation. Now I’ve learnt to take it easy and enjoy it and the fact that I can communicate with Chinese people.
Hah:)
I don’t have a problem with being in shape, I just don’t tan, I’m pretty close to representing the color of a snowman
I guess I’ll console myself with the fact that in some places of the world people don’t want a tan, they want to be as white as possible
*smiles*
This is so funny, I had pretty much this experience in Barcelona a few weeks ago. I’d never really felt self conscious before on a beach, but I was very white (a snow woman
) so some tanning in order next time! That aside, I like the message of this post – it’s real life after all isn’t it? 
Jen
Great article! It’s so funny to see how much gym subscriptions grow during the february-march each year. I think we should rather adopt a lifestyle that we actually like and feel good with ourselves.
@colin- realism. Sometimes I forget that such a thing exists. Perfectionism is so exhausting..haha.
@diggy- I am embarking on learning Spanish and know I will battle with the same thing. I just don’t understand why we are all so hard on ourselves. You’ll have to teach me some Chinese man!
@Jen- thanks so much for sharing your story. Part of the reason I write these random articles is because I am looking to relate. Glad I’m not the only one. I’d love to hear from you more often!
@Oscar- yep yep. Gym’s are stoked that time of year. Keeping in shape all year is definitely easier than yo yo dieting for certain seasons. It just takes fine tuning and tweaking rather than massive overhaul.
It’s also important to remember that so many things are subjective.
For someone who is 80 lbs overweight, losing 30 lbs is perceived to them as a huge accomplishment. But for someone who is only 15 lbs from their lean body mass, losing just 5 or 10 lbs of fat to see ripped abs is perceived to be a far bigger (and more difficult) accomplishment than the person who lost 30 lbs.
It really comes down to loving and accepting yourself for who you are. There will always be people with opinions, but what are the chances that someone is actually going to verbally express those negative opinions and make you feel uncomfortable? We make ourselves uncomfortable by being our own worst critic.
@Raam- it is all subjective and from one’s own perspective. You hit the nail on the head…”we make ourselves uncomfortable.” It’s definitely not other people…unless of course we put ourselves around mean peeps. Good friends and self confidence are key…we are good enough…we just never believe it for some reason. Thanks for your thoughts Raam.